THE BROKEN BUTTERFLY JOURNALS # 25

I missed him, so I stopped reading, stopped writing and decided to ask him to come in the room and chill with me. I thought a movie would be nice, a massage and a head start maybe. He was watching the reviews of some game on tv.. How about he told me I was selfish, Is there anyone out there with a penis, where did I go wrong? HUH? I just started to cry and decided I wanted back my old life. It made more sense.
I need to stop obsessing about him and focus on manifesting.
Focus is everything, which is why I'm very careful about what I choose to focus on. Always guarding my eye gates and ears, to only let the good in so I can stay positive and focus on good things. Some people find the way I choose to live aggravating, but it's my life and my choice, they need to go make some decisions of their own. This is how the broken butterfly roll. I know myself, I know what's best for me. I've made certain decisions along the way and while I'm willing to share my life and compromise certain things, the things regarding my mental health and emotional stability are written in stone. If that's hard to understand I suggest leaving me alone.
I don't watch the news, I don't read tabloids, I prefer not to listen to music that degrades women, I don't indulge in watching prejudice, perverted or twisted movies, and that's just me. This might seem geeky but that's just me. These choices were made of necessity, because they are indeed necessary. Every man has a right to choose. I AM woman and I have chosen. Some say I am crazy and I live in my own world, but we all do, it just happens I'm not pointing the finger at you.
I try not to infringe upon the rights of others. I Try to understand their pain, I try to act accordingly, It's etched in my brain. I require the same kindness. I fully realize that everyone has issues and I can accept people for who they are or leave them to grow, I require the same.

I can't be the picture you'd like to paint
And I won't get bent out of shape
I am already a masterpiece
But you keep trying to recreate me
If you can't love me the way I am
Leave me alone 
To find someone who can...

-Moshia'

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